Yini esikwaziyo ngelogi yomuntu, ngaphandle kokuthi kungukuthi (ngokungafani nensikazi), futhi iyinsimbi? Futhi akukho lutho olungaphezulu. Khona-ke kuyamangaza yini ukuthi singabaza ukuthi kungenzeka yini ukuba siqonde indoda? Kuhle ukuthi konke kulungiswa, manje sizobe sibone ukuthi abantu bacabanga kanjani, futhi masinyane sizoqala ukuqonda lezi zidalwa ezingavamile.
Abantu bacabanga kanjani?
Thatha ikhanda lakho, ungazi ukuthi ungayiqonda kanjani ilogi lamadoda? "Kodwa ubani owaziyo ngaphandle kwamadoda ngokwawo? Konke okufanele babale, bafakazele, mhlawumbe ngezixhumanisi kuMthethosisekelo. Futhi ngaphezu kwe-intuition, lezi zidalwa ezingenandaba nazo zihleka nje! "
Mhlawumbe othile uzovumelana lawa mazwi, futhi omunye uzokusheshisa ukufakazela ukuthi amadoda akakho konke lokho. Into ehle kakhulu ukuthi wonke amaqembu azoba ngendlela efanele. Ngakho-ke, abantu bacabanga kanjani, siphi isizathu sabo esisekelwe kulo?
- Ukucabanga kwamadoda kuyinsimbi ngempela, ngoba yakhiwa kumaqiniso. Akekho ozokwenza imicabango, abonise umbono wakhe, acabange amanga namahlebo. Yingakho bethishaza ulwazi lwethu, aluhlangene namaqiniso. Buza, kungani-ke, izingxenye zethu ezinamandla, ezihlomile isikhali esinamandla njengengqondo yomuntu, zivame ukulahlekelwa intuition yabesifazane? Kuyinto elula, owesifazane unobuthakathaka emzimbeni kunomuntu, kodwa unikezwa ukuhlakanipha okuhlakaniphile (intuition) njengenxephezelo. Ikuvumela ukuba ucabangele izinguquko ezincane esimweni bese udweba iziphetho ezifanele. Kodwa ingqondo ayikwazi ukwenza lokhu, kuhle ukuxazulula izinkinga ezingabonakali. Ngokuvamile, lapho ubhekene nezenzakalo zangempela, ngokuqinisekiswa ngokucacile ngengqondo yendoda, uchungechunge olunengqondo luyabhidliza.
- Ukucabanga komuntu kusekelwe embonweni ovamile wesithombe, abanandaba nezinto ezincane. Lo wesifazane uzocabangela imininingwane, ahlaziye, afune izinkomba ezincane. Yingakho indoda ingaboni izinguquko ezincane ekubukeni komuntu othandekayo. Into esemqoka ukuthi ibukeka isabukeka, futhi hlobo luni lombala wezinwele - uju noma igolide - alunandaba.
- I-logic yamadoda ibona idatha eyomile kuphela: izibalo, amaqiniso. Ayikho imibala engokomzwelo, okucacile okucacile nokucacile. Abesifazane bavame ukuthembela emizimbeni, empeleni intuition futhi basebenze emakhakheni amancane omzwelo. Kodwa kusukela emadodeni anjalo okungahle akhulume, akasoze adinga imizwelo ekuhloleni isimo. Ngakho-ke ungamangaleli umuntu wakho ngokungahloniphi uma ubuza umbono wakhe ngokubukeka kwakho. Uzama ngobuqotho ukukusiza, nje ukufuna amaqiniso, ukuze ahlele umbono wakhe kulokho.
Indlela yokukhuluma namadoda?
Kuvela ukuthi bahluke ngokuphelele, futhi kanjani ukukhuluma nomuntu, ukuze akuqonde?
Ngokuvamile, amadoda angakhululekile ukuxhumana, angaboni injongo yengxoxo - ingxoxo engenalutho ngesimo sezulu, kodwa ayikhuthazi "i-blouse kaTanya". Ngitshele ngqo ukuthi yini oyifunayo kusuka ku-interlocutor yakho. Futhi-ke, into empofu, izolahleka ekusakazeni kwakho kwamazwi futhi uzothukuthela ngesethulo eside kakhulu. Futhi uzizwe ungenasici ukungawuthandi muntu, ikakhulukazi amadoda angayithandi ngesifiso sabo sangunaphakade sobuholi.
Unganqikazi ukubuza imibuzo. Kodwa futhi kufanele futhi kube ngokuqondile, hhayi nje "ukuthi izinto zisebenza kanjani." Okokuqala, kumbuzo obabuzwa ngaleyo ndlela, cishe uzothola ukuthungatha okufakiwe.
Zonke izicabha ezicashile ziphuma engxoxweni nabangane abantombazane. Indoda ayinakwenzeka ukuyiqonda, noma iyaqonda, kodwa hhayi ngendlela oyifunayo. Ukusikisela kungabonakala njengemzamo yokusebenzisa, okungekho muntu ozoyibekezelela.
Ngakho umthetho oyinhloko wokukhulumisana ubuqotho nokuqondile, futhi kuyoba lula ukuba umuntu akhulume, futhi sizoletha umlayezo wethu kuye.