Ukuvala nokuqina akufaki ekuzithembeni ekukhulumeni nabantu. Ukuze ukwazi ukusekela isihloko sezingxoxo, ukuze ube ngumxhumanisi othakazelisayo - abaningi abakwazi ukuziqhayisa ngalokhu. Ukuzibandakanya njengomgangatho womuntu kuyadingeka ukuthuthukisa ngokwakho. Lokhu kungenzeka, into esemqoka ukubeka lo mgomo.
Abantu bahlukaniswe babe izinhlobo ezimbili: ama-extroverts nama-introverts. Uhlobo lokuqala luvulekile kubantu, ukuxhumana. Ama-Introverts yibo abhekiselwe kubo. Zivaliwe ezweni langaphandle. Lokhu kufanele kucatshangelwe futhi kube nokuzidela ngokwengeziwe ku-interlocutor enjalo.
Ukuzibandakanya nokuzibandakanya kunemibono emibili ehlukile. Sisho izincazelo ezilandelayo:
- ukuzibandakanya kuyisidingo somuntu sokuxhumana nabanye abantu;
- ukukhulumisana ikhono lomuntu ukusetha kalula nokusetha oxhumana nabo kunoma yiliphi iqembu isikhathi esincane.
Indlela yokuthuthukisa inhlalakahle?
Kulula ukuthathwa ngokukhuluma nomuntu onokuthile okushoyo. Abantu abanentshisekelo, abafundele, abafundelayo ngeke bakwazi ukushiywa ngaphandle kokunakwa. Kunoma iyiphi ingxoxo, umuntu onjalo uyamukelwa. Kubalulekile kithi ukuzwa umbono womunye kulokhu noma lowo mbuzo, ukuthola ukuthi umbono womuntu ungubani. Ngakho-ke ukuzivocavoca kokuqala kokuthuthukiswa komphakathi:
- okunye okumele ufunde, ubukele futhi ulalele izinhlelo zokuthuthukiswa, "ujabule" ngolwazi olusha.
- Abantu abakhuluma nabo abesabi ukujwayela abantu abasha. Kubo, lokhu kuyithakazelisa kakhulu. Ukuze ukwandise ukuxhumana kwakho, yenza lokhu okulandelayo:
- ngokushesha nje lapho uzithola usendaweni egcwele (isitolo, ipaki yokuzijabulisa, i-cinema, yaseshashalazini), ungaphuthelwa ithuba lokuza nokukhuluma nomuntu ongaziwayo. Uma wenza othintana nabo "abandayo", uba nesibindi futhi uyaqiniseka ukuthi uzoba nokuxhumana. Isihloko singaba esilula kakhulu: isimo sezulu, ukukhetha kwe-movie, umqondo ngemva kokubuka ukusebenza, njll;
- ziphoqe ukuba "ujabule" futhi ubonise isithakazelo esengeziwe kunoma iyiphi ingxoxo. Yakha umkhuba wokukhulumisana, ungahlali eceleni.
Ngokuvamile sidumala kakhulu lapho, lapho sihlangene ne-intanethi nomuntu othakazelisayo embonweni wethu, emhlanganweni wangempela, ngokungazelelwe abe yi-laconic. Iqiniso liwukuthi ukukhulumisana okungokoqobo kunikezwa lula kakhulu kunengxoxo yangempela. Abantu abanjalo abanalo ukuxhumana okuphezulu. Bangesaba abantu, noma bangabakhukhuzi ngokwabo, badume kakhulu, noma bonke ndawonye "ebhodleleni elilodwa". Khumbula ukuthi ukukhulumisana okuphilayo kuphela kuzokuletha umphumela oyifunayo ekuxazululeni inkinga yakho.