Yamukela ukuthi empilweni yakho kunezikhathi lapho isifiso sakho esithandekayo kakhulu "Ngifuna ukuhlonishwa". Wonke umuntu ufanelwe ukuhlonishwa abanye, kungakhathaliseki isimo sakhe senhlalo, ubudala nokubukeka. Kodwa akulula ukuthi bonke abantu baphathwe ngenhlonipho ekhethekile. Ngenxa yalesi sizathu, kunzima ukuba bafeze imigomo yabo, ukuzethemba kwabo kwehla, futhi ukuphila kuthola ukuguqulwa okuphelele kwamagundane amhlophe kumnyama.
Ake sizame ukuthola indlela yokuzihlonipha okudingekayo ukwenza lokhu nokuthi yisiphi isizathu sokuntula inhlonipho kokubili othandekayo nabanye.
Abanye abantu, ukuze bathole inhlonipho evela kubantu abathile, bathambekele ekujabuliseni wonke umuntu nomuntu ngokwenza kuphela lokho okulindelwe kubo, bangaqapheli ukuthi balahlekelwa yibo ngabanye. Phela, ngokumangalisa, bahlonipha, empeleni, abantu abanobuntu abanelungelo lokuzimela.
Ngakho-ke, isici sokuqala esithonya isimo sengqondo salabo abakuzungezile, nokuthi yini okufanele uyiqaphele inguquko ekubukeni kwakho siqu. Izimo eziyinhloko zomphakathi ukukukwamukela ngokulingana okulingana, uma isithombe sakho sihamba ngokuvumelana nokuthanda izinto zanamuhla, ubuhle, ubuhle. Kodwa ungakhohlwa ukuthi izingubo zizobukeka zikhulu kuwe, uma uzizwa ukhululekile kuyo.
Okwesibili, ungakhohlwa ngokuma kwakho. Ukuhleleka okuqondile futhi uthi ungumuntu ozimele nozethemba.
Buka izenzo zakho. Kufanele banikeze ithemba, kodwa hhayi ukuhlukunyezwa.
Ngokuvamile, ukungabaza kungesizathu sokuthi kungani umuntu engakwazi ukuqonda indlela yokwenza indoda ethandekayo nabanye abantu abakuzungezile bahloniphe wena.
Izengqondo zezenhlalo zikhomba izimbangela eziyinhloko, ngokusekelwe kokungabikho kokuphepha kwabo:
- Beka ukukhushulwa konke. Ngeshwa, ngisho nasebuntwaneni, abanye abazali nabafundisi baye banciphisa ikhono lomntwana lokuzimela. Ukukhula, kubantu abanjalo azikho amakhono okuzivikela, ngenxa yalokho okuvezwayo, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kubalulekile, kodwa ukuhlaselwa kokuziphatha okuvela kuzo.
- Ukungabi nokuziphatha. Kubuye kwenzeke nokuthi umuntu akazi ukuthi kufanele abe kanjani, ukuthi kufanele aphathe kanjani kahle esimweni esithile. Ayikho isitayela somuntu siqu sokuziphatha.
- Ukungabi namakhono okwenzayo. Uma umuntu engabonakali ngokwenza umgomo okwanele, akazinikeli ithuba lokuhlola ukuthi uqiniseka kangakanani kuye.
Hlonipha izihlobo
Kukhona nezimo zokuphila lapho owesifazane othembekile, umyeni ehluleka ukuhlonipha, naphezu kokuba phambi kwabanye bangumzekelo wokulingisa.
Impendulo yokuthi ungamphoqa kanjani indoda ukuba ihloniphe yena, iyoza emva kwengxoxo ezolile phakathi kwabashade phakathi kwabo. Kungenzeka ukuthi omunye wabalingani, kulokhu, umfazi, uyeke ukutshala imali yayo ekuthuthukiseni impilo yomndeni futhi ngenxa yalokhu kulahlekelwe inhlonipho emehlweni
Ukwenza kokubili umyeni nomunye umuntu akukwazi ukuhlonishwa. Kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuthi umuntu kufanele azihloniphe yena. Phela, isizathu sokuntula inhlonipho ngabathandekayo bakho ukulahlekelwa ngumuntu ngamunye, uvumelana kalula nombono wabaningi, besaba ukuvikela umbono wakho. Lokhu kungaba inkinga yakho. Bheka indlela oziphatha ngayo emndenini ovela ngaphandle, uyithokoze ngokucophelela futhi uphendule lo mbuzo ukuthi kungani amadoda engahloniphi abesifazane.
Indoda ngayinye izokukhathalela ngokukhethekile owesifazane, ngaphezu kwakho konke, ozihlonipha yena, engavumeli noma yikuphi ukuhlazeka ekhelini lakhe.
Ukuze uqonde ukuthi ungazifundisa kanjani ukuhlonipha, qaphela ukuthi ungumuntu onomuntu siqu, unelungelo lombono wakho kanye nesimo esibalulekile, ungavumeli othile ekuhlazulise futhi ukuhlonishwa kwabanye kuzofika kuwe ngokwakho.