Ngamanye amazwi, ukwephulwa ngokobulili kungukungaphathi ngokocansi ekuziphatheni komuntu. Okuhamba ngaphezu kwemigomo ejwayelekile evunyelwe yokuphila ngokobulili. Naphezu kokuthi emphakathini ngamunye, ngesikhathi esithile, lezi zimiso zazihlukile, singakwazi ukubona izinhlobo eziyinhloko zokungajwayelekile, okwamanje zibhekwa njengezimo ezibucayi zokukhathazeka kwengqondo.
Uhlu lweziphambeko zobulili kanje:
- fetishism. Umuntu uthola ukukhangwa ngokocansi nokwaneliseka lapho ebona ezinye izingxenye zomzimba, izingubo, into, efanekisela umlingani;
- ukudlulisa. Kulokhu, sikhuluma ngezifiso zocansi ngokugqoka izingubo zobulili obuhlukile;
- umbukiso. Indoda ithola ukwaneliswa ngokocansi uma ibonisa izitho zakhe zobulili kubantu abangabazi;
- I-Voyeurism. Isifiso sokuhlola ubulili, abantu abashadile. Inguqulo yakhe iyisifiso esinamandla ngokwezithombe zobulili ezingcolile;
- i-pedophilia. Enye yezindlela eziyingozi kakhulu futhi eziyingozi zokuphambuka ngokocansi. Iqukethe ukukhangwa ngokocansi ezinganeni;
- sadomasochism. Ukuthola injabulo ekubangela nokuzwa ubuhlungu, isifiso sokulawula umlingani noma isikhundla esiphansi.
Ukuphambana ngokocansi ezinsheni ezinzima kunzima kakhulu osukwini lwethu. Ukuvuthwa ngokobulili ekukhuleni akubunzima nje kuphela nezinguquko zomzimba, kodwa futhi nangokwengqondo. Ukungapheleli kokuzibandakanya ngokocansi kubangelwa ukushayela ucansi olungapheli futhi oluphakeme. Kulokhu, amathuba okuhlukana ngokocansi aphakeme kakhulu. Endaweni yengozi ekhethekile kunezingane ezineminyaka engezansi ubudala ezihudulwa kuyo, noma, ngokuphambene nalokho, zikhula ngokushesha.
Ukuphambana ngokobulili kwabasakhulayo baxhomeke ngokuqondile esimweni futhi bangesesikhashana. Ngenkathi yobudala, izinhlobo ezifanayo zezinkinga zivame ukudlula. Okuvamile kulezi:
- I-voyeurism (ukuhlola nge-naked, ukubukela izithombe ezingcolile);
- umbukiso;
- isithakazelo ngokweqile ezithombeni zofuzo zezingane ezincane noma izilwane.
Mayelana nezizathu nezindlela zokwelapha
Ukuphambana ngokobulili akusona isifo. Ukunakekelwa kwezokwelapha kuyadingeka kuphela uma ukwehlukana okunjalo kubangela ukunganaki kwengqondo nezinkinga zomuntu. Lezi zinsuku zingabuka ngenxa yokubonakaliswa kokulahlwa komthetho (ukuguqulwa, ukuhlukumezeka okunonya).
Ukwelapha ukwehlukana ngokobulili kusebenza zonke izinhlobo zezindlela zokwengqondo. Ngaphezu kokunciphisa isifiso esingavamile socansi, ukwelashwa kuhlose ukusiza ukwamukela umuntu njengoba ekhona. Ezimweni lapho ukuzilibazisa kusongela umphakathi, noma yiziphi izindlela zokulwa nokuhlukunyezwa ngokobulili zisetshenziswa. Ukwengeza ekusebenziseni ukwelapha okungekho emthethweni ekuphoqweni komthetho.
Yini ebangela ukuphuka okunjalo? Izimbangela zokungaziphathi ngokocansi zingabonakala kanje:
- ukuzalwa kofuzo;
- ukuhlukumezeka kobuchopho futhi, ngenxa yalokho, ukuphazamiseka kwengqondo;
- ukuhluleka kwesizinda se-hormonal;
- ukwephula okuhlukahlukene ekuthuthukisweni kwengqondo yomuntu;
- ukwephula ukuthuthukiswa kocansi;
- uhlobo lwemfundo yocansi.
Isizathu esiyinhloko okufanele siqashelwe ngokwehlukana ukuhlukunyezwa kwengqondo kwengane ebuntwaneni. Lokhu kungaba ukuxhashazwa kwabantwana kubantu abadala, isimo esibukeka ngengozi zobudlova ngokocansi noma ukulala ngokocansi, njll. Ngakho-ke, lapho ukhulisa ingane, umuntu kufanele akhumbule umthwalo obhekene nabazali.
Vikela impilo kanye nengqondo yengane.