Ngonyaka emashalofini wezincwadi zokuthenga ungathola izincwadi eziningi ngencazelo ehlukahlukene kakhulu yamasu wokuxhumana. Umgomo oyinhloko wamasu amaningi ukufundisa umfundi ukuba azizwe njengenhlanzi emanzini, ekhuluma nabantu abahlukene, kokubili ngobumnene nangomlingiswa, nasesimweni somphakathi.
Sizothola ukuthola inkomba ekuziphatheni okuphumelelayo kwabantu - okungaxhunyiwe, ukuthi kulula kangakanani ukugcina ingxoxo nomphakathi ngamunye omusha.
Ngingayigcina kanjani ingxoxo?
Uma ingxoxo ezayo ihlelwe futhi uhlushwa imicabango engaqondakali ukuthi ungenzi umqondo omuhle noma ukhohlwe nokuthi uhlela ukutshela, kufanele wenze imidwebo emincane ngalokho ofuna ukutshela khona. Ungakhohlwa ukuthi asikho isidingo sokugxeka noma kunoma yini. Ukulindela okuhle. Kungcono ukukhuluma ngalokho okuthandayo. Kodwa ungathathwa nendaba ye-ego yakho. Kujabulisa kakhulu umuntu ngamunye ukuba akhulume ngaye, ngakho ungakhohlwa ukubuza imibuzo evulekile ku-interlocutor yakho. Okusho ukuthi, cela lokhu, ukuthi i-interlocutor ayikwazi ukuphendula nge-"yebo" emfushane noma "cha." Yakha umbuzo wakho, ukuze umxhumanisi adinge ukukhuluma indaba emfushane empilweni yakhe noma ukuphendula ngamagama angaphezu kweyodwa, ngenxa yokuthi ungabutha ulwazi oluzokwenza imibuzo yakho elandelayo ibe lula. Ngaphezu kwakho konke okungenhla, ukuba nesithakazelo ezintweni zokuzilibazisa, impilo yomxhumanisi, ukwenza kucace ukuthi uyathandeka kakhulu kuwe njengomuntu, futhi awunaki yonke into ayishoyo.
Ungakhohlwa futhi ngokugubha ikhanda lakho ngenkathi ulalele. Ngemuva kwalokho, ukugqumisa kungaphezu kokungazi lutho kwemvume ngokuphathelene nombono ozwakalayo, kucacisa ukuthi imicabango ye-interlocutor ibalulekile kuwe.
I-interlocutor izoba nesithakazelo ezindabeni zakho uma zingakhulunywa ngokumelene, ngokwezibalo eziqinile, izibalo, njengokungathi ubika kubaphathi mayelana nomsebenzi owenziwe. Beka imizwa emazwini akho.
Indlela yokukhuluma nendoda?
Ake sihlale ukuthi yiziphi izihloko ongakhuluma nendoda okumele uyikhethe. Abameli besilisa abanamandla kakhulu bathanda izingqikithi ezibangelwa i-adrenaline. Bakhetha ingxoxo ewusizo, engokwenyama futhi evocative. Kungaba yizombangazwe, ibhola, umculo, amabhayisikobho, izimoto.
Yiqiniso, akuwona wonke owesifazane okwazi ukusekela ingxoxo mayelana "nabahambisa ngokuzenzekelayo abane-twin screw feeder screw", ngakho-ke okuhle kakhulu futhi okuthakazelisayo kuzo zombili izinhlangothi kuyoba ingxoxo yomphumelelo womuntu ezindaweni ezihlukahlukene zokuphila kwakhe. Uma ngabe usanda kuhlangana nje kusanda nje futhi ungakazi lapho usufinyelele khona ezindaweni eziphakeme, ungazama ukuthola ulwazi oludingayo ngosizo lwendlela ekhonjiwe ngaphambilini yemibandela evuliwe nevaliwe.
Uma owesifazane engenandaba nalokho, ake siqhubekele ekukhulumeni ngamadoda.
Uma ufuna ukuphumelela ekukhulumisaneni nobulili obuhlukile, khona-ke amathuba okuba uzwelana ngokukhulumisana luyokhuphuka, uma kungaphezulu kwezingqikithi zabesifazane, uzobe uqondiswa kulezo zihloko amadoda angaxoxa ngawo ngamahora. Okungenani izikhathi eziningana ngeviki, ube nesithakazelo ezindabeni ezombusazwe zomhlaba wonke, bheka iwebhusayithi yezithombe ze-movie. Kodwa, uma ungakhetha izihloko ezifanele zengxoxo, ungakhohlwa ukuthi usebenzisana namadoda, futhi ngeke bakuqonde kusukela emgqeni wezwi.
Ake sicabangele izindlela zokusiza ukuphendula umbuzo wokuthi ungaxhumana kanjani namadoda, ukuze emva kokuphela kwengxoxo, kokubili wena nomxhumanisi wakho wanelisekile.
- Ngakho-ke, ngenkathi uxhumane namadoda, kufanele ugweme isingeniso eside, futhi ungafuni ukufaka umcimbi ochazwe ngezinye izici noma izingqikithi.
- Ingxoxo nomuntu kufanele ibe ecacile futhi ephelele. Ngaphandle kwalokho ungaphazamisi ingxoxo yakho ngenye indaba ethembeni lokuthi umlingani wakho uzophinde akwazi kalula ukubamba lokho okwakushiwo. Ngalesi sikhathi, ubuchopho bomuntu buqala ukuzama ukuthola ubuhlobo obuhle phakathi kwezindaba ezimbili. Zama ukunamathela ekulandelaneni esitatimendeni sakho.
- Zama ukugwema izimpendulo zemizuzu. Ungasebenzisi imishwana efana nokuthi "Ayikwazanga ...". Ukusabela kumuntu wokugcina kungavumelana ngokwengqondo ukuthi uyakwazi ukufeza isicelo sakho. Yena, ezimweni ezingavamile, uzoqonda ukuthi lesi sicelo. Leli gama lakho, uzobheka ukuthi unesithakazelo engxenyeni yakho mayelana namandla akhe okukwenza
lokho okushiwo - Uma ngesikhatsi uxoxisana nendoda, uyakuphazamisa ngentshiseko, eveza umcabango ovele uvele, angeke akhube nhlobo uma usebenzisa amaqhinga afanayo.
Ukuthi phakathi nengxoxo awukwazi ukukhuluma namadoda, kungcono ukulahlekelwa, ukulahlekelwa impilo yakho, ungahlanganyeli izimfihlo mayelana nezinkimbinkimbi zakho. Akudingeki ukwazi ukuthi yini ongayithandi ngokubukeka kwakho, mayelana namaphilisi akho engeziwe futhi mayelana nokugqoka komama wakho kuwe. Dala emcabangweni wesilisa isithombe sakho esiyimpumelelo.