Kuphela ngekhulu le-20 kuphela, izazi ze-psychotherapists, izengqondo ze-psychoanalyst kanye nezengqondo zezokwelapha zazingena ekutadisheni yonke imizwa phakathi kwabesifazane nabesilisa. Akudingeki ukuba uye kubabikezeli benhlanhla, ukuze ufunde kabanzi ngothando. Isayensi yanamuhla manje iyakwazi ukutshela okuningi, kuhlanganise nalowo okhona izibonakaliso zothando.
Kufanele kuqaphele ukuthi kunezinhlobo eziyisithupha zothando. Zifana nje ngaphandle, kepha imizwa ebagcwalisa yona ihluke komunye nomunye. Ngakho-ke, kuwo wonke ama-akhawunti, izinhlobo ezinjalo zothando njengo-pragma, agape kanye nesitolo zibhekiswe ekuthandweni, futhi i-lyudus ne-eros ibhekisela ezintweni ezifana nothando lothando, ukuthanda, ukuthanda.
Izimpawu zothando lwangempela
Uthando lunemikhuba eminingi futhi konke okuyinkimbinkimbi ngendlela yabo. Zihlukaniswe zibe yimpumelelo nesekondari.
Izimpawu zothando oluyisisekelo zikhona kuwo wonke umuntu, ngisho noma okwamanje akanayo umlingani ohlala njalo. Isibonelo, lokhu kubonakala ngesifiso sentombazane ukuthi ngaso sonke isikhathi sibonakale singenakuqhathaniswa, sigqoke imihlobiso ehlukahlukene, ubuke ukwakheka kwayo. Kubantu abasha, izibonakaliso eziyinhloko zivezwa kakhulu kunesisini sobulili besifazane. Ngakho-ke, isibonakaliso sokuqala sothando samadoda ukubonakaliswa kokukhangwa kocansi. Uma, ngenkathi ingxoxo nawe, i-interlocutor yakho ibheka umugqa wokunquma kwakho isikhathi eside, khona-ke uyazi ukuthi angabhekwa njengomkhwenyana ongase abe khona.
Ngeke kube yinto engafanele ukukhombisa ukuthi lezi zimpawu zibonakala zingabonakali kubantu abadala, futhi kulaba besifazane asebekhulile bazibonakalisa ngesifiso esinesifiso sokubhaka amapizi kubantu abathandayo.
Izibonakaliso zokuqala zesithando sesibili zithinta ngokomzwelo. Emantombazaneni, babonisa ushintsho olusheshayo lwengqondo, akukho mgwaqo ocacile phakathi kokuthokoza okungenakuvinjelwa kanye nokuhleleka futhi, ngokungaqondakali, isifiso sokulandela izikhathi, ukubuka iwashi. Kubesifazane abavuthiwe, bazibonakalisa bekulungele ukuqapha ukuhlanzeka kwezinto zakhe, ngomzamo wokwakha ubuciko bokudla.
Kulabo besifazane, abaneminyaka yabo eseduze no-30, izimpawu zesibili zothando oluqinile zisondelene nobulili. Abesifazane othandweni ngokuvamile bavame ukushintsha ukubukeka kwabo, ukubaluleka kwekhanda, isiketi, ijazi, amakha.
Kwabafana, izibonakaliso zesibonakaliso zibonakaliswa ngenye indlela yobuwula, zingakhulekela into yokukhuleka kwazo, ziwela ngokushesha bese ziziphatha njengabafana abancane. Futhi lezi zibonakaliso zivezwa ngokuhlukunyezwa kwaleyo nsizwa. Kungase kubonakale kuye ukuthi kunezithiyo eziningi enjabulweni yakhe.
Emadodeni amadala, lezi zibonakaliso zibonakala eqinisweni lokuthi, ngenkathi bevakashela, cishe basakaza, njengokungathi ekhaya, embhedeni. Kodwa akusona uphawu lwesibili ukuthi weza kuwe ngezimbali zomhlangano. Izimbali akuzona zonke izibonakaliso zothando. Kodwa kungalindelekile ukuthi kungase kuzwakale, izibonakaliso zothando lwangempela azibandakanyi ushokoledi onikeziwe kuwe njll Kodwa uma umuntu egeza izitsha endlini yakho, udinga ukucabanga ngakho.
Izimpawu ezingabonakali zothando
Izimpawu ezibalulekile zokubonakaliswa kothando yilulimi lomzimba lomuntu othandweni.
- Ngakho-ke, indoda ethandwayo izolwela njalo ukuba isensimini yethonya lomuntu wesifazane (kude no-1-1.5 m ukusuka kuye).
- Yeka ukuthi akumangalisi, kodwa uzozenza sengathi akanandaba nomuntu okhethiwe. Kusukela esemncane, lokhu kuziphatha kujwayelekile kubantu.
- Ngomuntu othandweni, ukuthinta kubaluleke kakhulu. Ezimweni zokuqala zokuxhumana, uzama, ngokusobala, ukulimaza owesifazane, isibonelo, ukudlulisa indebe yetiyi.
- Futhi kwabesifazane kuyisici sokudambisa amehlo abo, ngezinye izikhathi bawadubula ngaphansi kwamajwabu amehlo.
- Njengamadoda, abesifazane bayakwazi ukungamnaki umthandi wabo. Beha njengalaba besifazane abambalwa abanomlingiswa wesilisa.
- Abesifazane abathandekayo ababukeli kude nomuntu oyifunayo. Uma imibono yabo ihlangene, ihlazekile, kungenzeka ukuthi ngokubonisa, ibheka kude.
Uthando luzwa umuzwa onzima kakhulu. Fundisisa imizwelo yakho, imizwa yakho, ungadideli uthando ngothando, ungazishiyi ukukhohliswa imizwa.