Akakwazi ukuqonda nganoma iyiphi indlela, kungani enza sengathi-bangumndeni, esikhundleni sokubhalisa ngokomthetho ubuhlobo babo? Kubonakala sengathi banomndeni, futhi akukho sidingo sokwenza okunye okunye, ngoba sebevele ndawonye. Khona-ke intombazane icabanga ukuthi ingamshada kanjani, yenze kanjani lo muntu, ekugcineni, anikele futhi anikeze indandatho?
Isinyathelo sokuqala: Hlola
Amadoda ayenabazingeli, futhi amaxhoba abo angabesifazane. Futhi ungubani: i-trophy elandelayo kulolu chungechunge lwezinqola noma enye yesoka lakhe, ozomvumela ukuba ashade naye-ukuthi kubaluleke kangakanani ukwazi kwethu! Phela, amantombazane kalula anqotshwa yintando yomuntu! Ngakho zibuze imibuzo engu-7 uphinde uthole - kufanelekile ukushada le ndoda kuwe - ngaphambi kokuthi ulahlekelwe ikhanda lakho ngokubanjwa kwinethiwekhi yakhe:
- Ukuthatha inombolo yefoni yakho, akazange abuyise ngosuku olulandelayo noma abizwe ngokushesha?
- Ingabe sekwephuzile uma ehlangana nawe, noma uhlale ufika ngesikhathi?
- Ingabe uvumela amahlaya angcolile, anesithakazelo kuphela kwezocansi nawe, noma ufuna ukuqonda izifiso zakho nezidingo zakho, amanani akho nemigomo yakho?
- Ingabe izidingo zakho azizinaki noma uzilungele ukuzithoba, uma lokhu kubalulekile kuwe?
- Ingabe ufihla ezihlotsheni zakho, abangane, ozakwabo noma owethulwe izihlobo zakho?
- Unqabe ukuya enkampanini yakho noma kubazali bakho noma uyavuma ukuhlangana nabo?
- Ingabe ucabanga ngokukhuluma ngezingane ngaphambi kwesikhathi noma ukucabanga ngokujulile ngomndeni wesikhathi esizayo?
Uma okhethiweyo wakho elalelisisa futhi ewunakekile, ehlonipha wena futhi ewacabangayo ngezidingo zakho, ehamba nawe ukuze abe nemihlangano engahlelekile kanye nemikhosi yomndeni futhi engafihli ubuhlobo bakho - kufanele wenze imizamo yokushada le ndoda uqobo, njengoba ekuhlonipha futhi engafuni ukulahlekelwa nguwe .
Isinyathelo Sesibili: Ukucacisa Isimo
Abesifazane abaningi abakwazi ukuqonda nganoma iyiphi indlela: kungani kufanele balinde isikhathi eside kangaka, kungani kungekho isinyathelo esivela kumuntu othandekayo futhi yena ngokwakhe kufanele acabange ukuthi angamshada kanjani? Kunezimpendulo ezingu-3 kuphela kule mibuzo:
- Indoda yakho isivele ishada nomuntu.
- Awuyena wesifazane obukayo futhi angathanda ukushada naye.
- Awumtshelanga ukuthi ufuna imibhangqwana futhi akazange afune ukuthi akushade naye.
Akulula abesifazane ukwamukela noma iyiphi yalezi zimpendulo. Besaba ukuzwa ukuthi banomphikisana, besaba ukuthola iqiniso, okuyinto ezoba buhlungu kakhulu kubo, ekugcineni, bamiswa ukwesaba ukulahlwa futhi bahlale bodwa. Noma kunjalo, ngenxa yedivayisi yokuphila komuntu siqu ephephile kubalulekile ukwazi konke okuphathelene nobuhlobo bakho.
Futhi uma uqinisekile ukuthi uyakuthanda futhi akukho zithiyo emshadweni - thatha isinyathelo sesithathu ukushada nendoda yakho ethandekayo, ngoba yena ngokwakhe akakwazi ukuzethemba.
Isinyathelo sesithathu: Isidingo
Bonke abantu bayazi: umshado nomndeni - lokhu kukucindezeleka. Futhi bayazi nokuthi ngokushesha kuzokwenzeka kuzo. Kodwa eziningi zazo azikho umqondo wokuphuthuma, ikakhulukazi uma owesifazane othandekayo ethula futhi engasho lutho ngomshado. Ngakho-ke, udinga ukunquma ukuthi yini oyifunayo - ukubona eduze komthandi noma umyeni; mshade naye, ngoba ulindele isinyathelo esivela kuwe, noma ulindele ukuba anqume futhi azenze yena ngokwakhe? Futhi uzolinda isikhathi esingakanani? Unyaka, ababili noma mhlawumbe eziyishumi? Okuningi? Akukuhle yini ukutshela umuntu wakho:
"Ngiyakuthanda kakhulu, wena nami senza kahle kakhulu, ukuthi angizange ngikuphuphe ngendaba. Futhi manje ngifuna ngempela ukushada nawe. Ngifuna ukuthi ucabange ngakho futhi usethe usuku lomshado wethu. Kuze kube sishadile, angizizwa ngijabule ngempela. "
Uthando lunamandla kunokwesaba
Yiqiniso, akulula ukunquma ngaleyo ngxoxo kuqala, ngoba amantombazane akufanele atshele amadoda ukuthi afuna ukushada nabo. Kodwa kulula ukuhlala nendoda, ukubeletha izingane zakhe, bese uhlala yedwa, ngoba wayenenhloso yokudala umndeni? Kungani uchithe iminyaka ethile into engakufaneleki? Kungcono ukufuna manje ukuthi usebenze njengomuntu futhi umtshele ukuthi umshade naye noma umvumele ahambe, ngoba akakuthandi futhi akahambisani nawe.
Ungesabi ukulahlekelwa yilo. Uma wenqaba - lo akuyona indoda yakho. Uma ekuthanda ngempela, uzokuzithoba kuwe.