Ungabuyisa kanjani isithakazelo somuntu?

Noma ubuphi ubudlelwano ekuqaleni bubukeka njengenganekwane, kodwa emva kweminyaka embalwa abambisene nabo abambalwa babheka umphefumulo wabo womshado ngothando olungakaze lubonakale emehlweni abo. Lokhu kuzoqinisekiswa hhayi ngowesifazane oyedwa. Ukubuyela kuye isithakazelo somuntu othandekayo, ngokumangalisa, kalula. Into eyinhloko okufanele uyikhumbule ngokuhlakanipha kwabesifazane yizinyathelo ezincane ezikhona kithi ngamunye.

Ungabuyisa kanjani inzalo yomyeni wakhe?

Ukuze ubuyekeze imizwa yangaphambili yesethenda, izazi zengqondo zincoma kakhulu ukuthi ulahlwe amacala, uthethelele umthandi wakho. Ubudlelwane kufanele buhlale buphuthukisiwe, futhi noma yikuphi ushintsho oluhle lungenakwenzeka uma, kanye nabo, lithwale umthwalo wokuthukwa, amazwi angakhulumi, intukuthelo nokudabuka.

Kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukuthi usuku lokuqala lapho uqaphela ukuthi nguyena kuphela owayefuna ukwabelana nayo yonke iminithi yenjabulo nesimo sezulu esibi. Hlala emuva, vala amehlo akho bese uzama ukugxila kulowo mzuzwana. Zama ukuphendula imibuzo elandelayo:

• Ngangiyini ngaleso sikhathi?
• kungani ngimheha?
• Ngingabuyisela yini le mfanelo yomlingiswa , ukuziphatha nokunye okunye?
• Ingabe ngilungele ukushintsha ukuze ubuhlobo bethu bugcwele uthando olusha kanye nezikhathi ezingenakulibaleka zenjabulo?

Kubalulekile ukuphendukela owesifazane ongekho muntu ofuna ukuhamba. Futhi akukhona ngabantu abathandekayo abafuna ukugcina umthandi wabo ngaphansi kwesithende, njalo kusihlwa, ukuhlela izigcawu zomhawu nazo zonke izinhlobo zokudlala ezingadingekile.

Ngeke kube okungathandeki ukusho ukuthi abesifazane abaningi abathola isitembu epasipoti yabo, bayeka ukuzikhathalela, babuke ukubukeka kwabo. Njengoba wazi, amadoda afana amehlo nalezi zindaba asendulo njengezwe, kodwa abantu abaningi kungenzeka bakhohlwe ngakho.

Ngakho-ke, kubalulekile ukuba abe oyedwa ozokwazi ukulahlekelwa. Futhi, uma udinga nje ukuguqula ukubukeka kwakho, kodwa futhi usebenze ngezimfanelo ezithile zomuntu siqu, into eyinhloko ukuthi lezi zinguquko zisekelwe othandweni lwakho, futhi kuphela-kumyeni wakhe. Kungani kungukuthi ukubuyisela isithakazelo somlingani wakho, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi uthanda kangakanani, umngane wakhe, udinga, uma nje uthanda wena? Kungenxa yokuthi uma ubeka kuqala, uhlakaze ngokuphelele kulo muntu, ulahlekelwa okuhlukile, uqobo lwakho "Mina", futhi lokhu, ngeshwa, yiphutha labafazi abaningi.

Kubalulekile ukuthi ufunde ukufihla imizwa yakho kancane, hhayi ukumthumela ukuthi athande imiyalezo njalo ngomzuzu. Konke kufanele kube ngokulinganisa futhi lokhu akufanele kukhohliwe.